I drank it, and now my boss keeps hitting me in the face with beams of light.
Tripping at your desk probably isn't the best plan you've had.
I can tell how much and what I drank by my morning shits
turns out making maccaroni and cheese with whipped cream instead of butter is only good when your high
I can neither confirm or deny any bear related allegations right at this time.
Great I'll forever be branded as gym slut at the new gym.
She told me to act like the hulk during sex. Shit got 9 different shades of weird
Haha! I've never met his girlfriend, so my main focus will be not saying,"you're the only person in this room that doesn't know what my vagina feels like."
you 2 were alone in the living room and the dog walked in and you started yelling what are all these people doing in here
Partying with them is like having your dick stapled to your left nostril
Just wanted to say, I appreciate your bravery in having read receipts
hell no. i was not wasting my two tears of virginity on him.
When do you estimate your next shower will be? Several people have asked.
you know your booty call is really trying when he offers to pay the toll for the bridge you have to cross to get to his house
Ccatlin cimbing thru th sunroof plz come
A guy just threw up in my lecture of 500 ppl and just got up and walked away
Randomize