I'm going to start giving girls scratch off lottery tickets when they leave my place in the am. That way they have a chance of not regretting the night before
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I have a huge bruise on my thigh that I am 95% sure is due to you repeatedly throwing me over couches.
We lost power at midnight which freaked out my roomate and friends. The power came back on 30 minutes later. We are now at the bar having "the rapture came and we were left behind" shots
Remember that time I got suspended in eighth grade, well it was like that but I was on acid and wearing goggles
Riding the train home at 6 am for class still drunk is losing its novelty in my junior year
note: just because the casino is called bourbon street, it doesn't mean you can puke and keep walking and no one will care. chalk me up for another 86
Yeah, it was all very half-hearted. In the middle of sex we both just stopped and looked at each other and said, "can we just sleep instead?"
That is so sad.
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Basically one minute I'm sucking on her nipples and then 45 mins later we're at work and she's my boss.
I want to be a supportive friend to her, but I also want to sleep with her ex now that he's single.
Leaving the puke on the ceiling as a reminder.
Not only did I sleep with the guy but I think I may have called my work and quit to go work for him.
I'm declaring this weekend Captain Morgan weekend
You declare every weekend Captain Morgan weekend...
You just don't understand... :'(
Well she's 'call Wayne Gretzky a whore' drunk so you tell me.
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