Is there a tactful way for me to ask a girl to let me know when she gets her period?
we lost you for like an hour and then found you at some dive bar trying to teach dance lessons
you came home soaking wet, and when I asked where your umbrella was, you pulled it out of your bag and were so proud you kept it dry.
So I drew a giant robot attacking a city on the chem test. My TA colored in the fire on the burning building
as she was beating the hell out of his ex, she screamed prison rules, and smashed her head with a beer bottle. I'm oddly afraid yet so attracted to her now.
This breakup hit defcon 5. Walked to pathmark with a denim jacket over my nightgown to get ben and jerrys. On sale btw.
I let my daddy issue flag fly free last night.
Were you drinking last night?
Because typically I don't associate the phrase 'Go sleepy time' with sobriety.
Oh. My. God. You texted my mom "IM BACK BITCHES!"
Jk probs not coming. Tequila
FOUND MY PANTIES COMINY JOME
do I look like a person who has full control of their limbs and existence on this plane of reality
He was 6'5 and wearing a kilt, how could I not fuck him
I texted him back and I am so nervous I may vomit up all of the soup I just ate.
I have a bag of frozen peas on my vagina. If you want to talk about real problems.
Randomize
