No, that was before the police came, but after the hooker.
I just ate a cashew that looked EXACTLY like your dick.
i think it was just a coincidence but she literally vomited the second she saw my penis.
Are you still at the party or did I leave?
he asked me for a gerbil feeder full of alcohol
bark. im thoroughly looking forward to kegs and eggs. next weekend should be pancakes and pinnical, then cereal and seagrams and then whiskey and waffles.
You never know, some chick could have a weird unibrow fetish.
It's amazing I mean I blew that senator just for him to deny me marriage.... Politics suck and he swallowed!
He just grabbed my boob and justified it by saying "I just wanna feel your heart beat"
You were drunk enough to sled down a highway off ramp in your pajamas….
The only joy I have here is being able to shit with the door open.
So you can text and rub it at the same time? Bravo.
I can do anything and masturbate, if I truly wanted to.
Ewe he just snapped me a pic of his butt crack.. Should I be concerned?
I sure hope so...I wonder if he could tell in that email that I'm really good at blow jobs. Hopefully he heard that tone. Any means necessary.
We all love a big dick, but you’re going to develop a reputation if you keep asking every guy at the bar ‘how big your dick’
That’s all I’m saying
Randomize
