Swine flu. Run for my life!
this girl literally referred to her butthole as her "back pussy"
She looks makes a Zellweger face when she cums, she's keeps asking why I call her renee
I think forcing your little sister to drink with you on a Wednesday when she has school the next day is the low point of alcoholism.
first day of class and my professor asked me if i was going to come to class drunk all semester.
ive decided something. ive accepted you as being gay. but i havent accepted you as a vegetarian yet.
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
I'll do a soapy photo shoot for you in the shower. No loofas, though. Once you get one of those caught in your nipple ring, you never go back.
Thanks for the viagra you gave me last night. I ended up getting called in to work to cover a shift. So I had to tell Kayla that I couldn't hang out and I had to try and hide my dick all night while walking serving people food all night.
I LEAVE YOU TWO ALONE FOR 45 MINUTES AND ALL MY WHIPPED CREAM AND CONDOMS ARE GONE
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
Guess whose hungry like a hippo: this bitch.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
Good dick will make you do a lot of things… Great dick will make you consider buying a house.
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
