i threw up in a trash can last night at kellys irish times. but in a trash can because i'm a lady
This was all being yelled across a beer pong table as all important things should be discussed
its 10 pm and i am cleaning vomit off the ceiling. i am nowhere near drunk enough for this to be funny.
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
I was hitting on her while she was puking ... yeah i was pretty drunk
I am sitting on the couch "eating" a frozen big bucket margarita with a spoon.
She's pathetic and vulnerable..and short. Thats his type.
I don't know how I feel about the stuff we got from that guy. Me and Monty are driving through town listening to static at full blast...
Note to self: Do not bring gift bag with cock ring inside to family Christmas. Leave to unwrap at home.
he tried to give me his business card but gave me his health insurance card then realized it and offered to take me to the strip club
I think the last straw was when you put on ice skates to go across the waxed wooden floor.
Three Asian guys got on the elevator with a handle of Hennessey and a sleeping bag. This is not the start of a joke.
We're sitting in the bathtub, eating pizza, doing shots of vvodka and comparing nipples. I havfe never been so comfortable in my life.
He yelled "I'm Bruce Springsteen!" when he came. This is why I don't sleep with guys from Jersey.
We banged in my car doggy style with my head out the window. The sky was marvelous and I saw a shooting star. Its destiny; we're meant to fuck forever.
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