Wow senior week shows you new things about yourself
Is this the I'm gay speech?
I have to start avoiding pregnant women. This is getting out of hand.
and the mascot is a pinecone. its really no surprise that people here dont get laid
Just shot my load on a stink bug. Thought you should know.
It's so hard to find a shirt to wear out that is easily taken off, cut off my paramedics, but says "I'm a grown, respected woman"
What time do you think you'll be heterosexual?
It's like bringing a chick home from the bar the night before and waking up to thinking you are about to go another round... Just to wake up and find she's already left...
The ranger made you choose between a ticket and pouring all the beer out since it was a state park.
I've never seen you that close to tears as you poured out 30 beers.
LinkedIn just suggested I might know the guy I caught my wife fucking.
I've already come to terms that I'm gonna have to bone a few gross librarians, but hey, it's college
She was chasing her shots with beefaroni and I think I fell in love.
Are you trying to say I've made an emotionally well rounded transformation similar to the Grinch?
For the record you're a very classy lady and your love for and mastery of strap-ons is amazing. I would gladly marry you and father your offspring
HOW THE FUCK IS IT POSSIBLE THAT THE JUNIOR HIGH STUDENT IS BETTER AT BEING AN ADULT THAN I AM!?!?
The thought of you trying to procreat frightenes and disgusts me!
Randomize