Come on the kid is gayer than me
Like the straightest thing he could do right now is take it up the butt
I think the world might be a better place if everyone was capable of having open relationships.
There are rumors he has a square penis....ill do anything though....
Dudes got a Polo tattoo. I don't care if he has a yacht I can't handle that level of gay.
I wasn't hungover this morning. My head just hurt because someone tried to suction cup a dildo to my forehead.
Most sexually ambiguous night of my life. Kept switching from the NBA finals to the Tonys.
Holy. Crap. I just found a hickey on my bikini line. He never got my pants off. WHO IS THIS MYSTICAL HOOKUP WIZARD?
Everything is just really out of control. I hear puking from three different parts of the house. Roger has black eye from being punched. Kaiser tried shaving his head, but somehow burned himself. Music is bumping, but everyone is either puking and calling out for help or blacked the fuck out.
I'm happy in my shell. My shell which consists of keeping guys in the friend zone and me masturbating...
Just made a bong out of a pineapple. So yes.. And champagne is about to be popped
I hope you get a lego stuck in your dickhole
I was told I look like trouble once and that was by a fireman at the sex show. I was carrying two beers and a penis pinata.
Also I like oatmeal more than sex.
is it still the walk of shame if his dad gave me a 'thanks for sleeping with my son' head nod on my way out this morning?
Just saw a hotel with a bunch of mattresses in the parking lot. Made me think of you.
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