For what it's worth, your chances of anal go up the more she loves you. There's always a silver lining.
hapi new year, hope this year brings u happiness and lots of sexi people ;)
stop writing like that.
I'm drinking margaritas out of a soup mug, of course I'm going to get wasted
I know it's not your turn to do the dishes, but since they're covered in your puke, it is.
I really want to know why half of my kitchen floor is missing.
well... just scaled a wall and entered the bar through the balcony. just making some last minute memories nbd.
I just burped jalapeños and cum. That was the most disgusting thing ever.
Well the weed wore off around 10:30 and then the date dragged on until about 1 in the morning. So I've decided I really need to start smoking closer to the actual start time of a date. Then maybe they'd be more bearable.
I dreamt of sea otters and your boobs. My two favorite things.
Hows cali? I thought of you as I shaved 1/4 of my legs last night.
Smoking a bowl in nothing but a flamingo thong.
Should I take a fireball shot or brush my teeth?
Literally I woke up the other day and the girl part of me was like “GET CUFFED MOTHERFUCKER” and I went ham on tinder.
there's no judgement here...i was recently just fingered in my dorm hallway while having a conversation with 5 people.
Well, not only did I find out the Top Knight has roof access, I also let a guy I just met eat me out on the roof. Seems like a lot of wins if you ask me.
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