is it true that cum stays in you for 7 years?
that's gum
The chick I went home with last night had a happy trail
You lit the bowl with a rolled up paper towel that you ignited on the stove.
i was just skypeing her and i saw the vagisil medicated wipes in the corner of her room. i'll be breaking this off tomorrow
you came back at 4am in a suit jacket and a half eaten burrito...
Hello wreck, this is your train calling.
Wow... that's disturbing man, and their not even my balls
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
If you start sounding at all like you're even remotely in love, expect a lecture on the merits of being a single woman with a vibrator.
This is why we're friends.
He wants to make love to me in a sea of paint and wash my tears away with the brushes surrounding us..I've known him for 2 days.
he was holding the bottle like a running back yelling for security and the national guard as he was being tackled
My head feels like a nest made of hair and cum
Pretty sure my idea of standards went out the window when I hooked up with a guy who had a rooster tattoo with an arrow pointing down to his no no bits. Think about it.
So, Cheetos don't microwave great.
I wanna get to the point where I can just send a question mark and get an exclamation point in response
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