At a place where you lie naked on a big pile of pillows and they feed you lobster. You eat it with your bare hands.
I meant the "stage" gay, Not the "bend me over and call me Gary" gay.
You mailed him a break up letter, because you thought the "joy of receiving a letter" would ease the pain of you dumping him.
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
i cant answer while inside this church craft show. so unless you're outside with my engagement ring and a nonfat gingerbread latte, it'll have to wait.
Okay: Whipped cream, vodka, and a trampoline. This will either be really great, or really tragic.
seis de mayo is my least favoite holiday because i usually spend it in bed sobbing over my poor life decisions from the night before.
Opened my purse to realize I have someone else's birth certificate. What happens to me in college?
my roommate had a few special brownies and wrapped my purse and one of my shoes and left them under the tree for me...
I support your vibrator fueled lifestyle.
I can't believe I watched you put a tampon in in the parking garage
Finally finished unpacking shit from school n found a bra with no idea whose it is... I miss college so much it hurts sometimes
Getting so old my power naps are turning into, "can I reasonably just go to bed at this time?"
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Randomize
