is that paris hilton dressed up as the guy from star trek who hosts reading rainbow
Ok walking to car, 3 gay guys park get out of car, one on phone says 'I dont know but I was definately getting some curb rubbing'
My friends, they love my intelligence
i wokr up in ohio with no clothes. i think someone gave me ecstacy. can you come find me please it's cold.
Through a series of unfortunate circumstances, I think I just sprayed lime juice on my vagina.
She was lying in bed moaning while eating a Snickers and masturbating.
Pot didnt help. Now Im even sadder but now im afraid of the clouds and the crickets.
i've really grown. sober me left an alarm for me every 10 minutes that said NO FAT CHICKS!
dude. im stealing that.
How's your threesome situation going?
Optimistic
I think I'll handle my grief by throwing myself headlong into lesbianism. Seems like a fitting tribute to you.
Why is my fridge empty save for a basketball???
L'Shannah Tovah!
Whats that? My new stripper name?
this party is nice, but i have to go home and cry over anime in order to fill my daily quota of suffering
You had sex with him AND his man bun. Like not just him but also the bun.
I kid you not. He let me in into his house, showed me the putt putt in his backyard. Offered to play me.
Randomize
