My clean wipe streak was ended today by two enchiladas and a can of refried beans. dammit i should have been more cautious. thanks for all ur encouragement and support.
conclusion of the day: americans need to get on tredmills, people need to learn how to flush toliets and learn how to pee in then instead of on them, and waiters shouldnt tell their life stories to customers.
Its what jesus would do if there were bud light in his time. I feel obligated.
the cop cuffed us all with 40's still taped to our hands
Can you call him, he said something about going to the balcony to pee and now hes texting me saying hes lost
Dude, I had to masturbate just to stay warm. Please pay the gas bill?
If i need to get strippers involved i will.
Great. My funeral dress now smells of smoke and disappointing sex.
there was 12 of us, girls included, shirtless and wielding swords as we bet on rock paper scissors in the middle of the bar. It was like Cinco de Mayo version of the Deer Hunter
Sorry you had to clean the sheets with your macro notes
I'm by the tree and the Dora the explorer balloon .. Look for the Dora the explorer balloon
The lowest point of my life has been reached. I just drank half a jar of pasta sauce.
So after we found out he wasnt throwing up blood in was just hawaiian punch and we all failed breathalyzers the cop drove us around like a taxi and brought us back to the apartment
Wtf happened last night
You traded your bra for a shot so I'd say you probably don't wanna know
He has a wall filled with panties from past hook ups. So no, I didn't fuck him.
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