I cant go down on him yet. All ive had to eat is olives and percocet. semen would only add to tomorow mornings discomfort.
Should I hook up with a slut its your call
Yes. Wrap it. If you dont have a condom do it anyway. YOU ONLY LIVE ONCE.
his receeding hairline makes running into him so much less awkward. almost enjoyable actualy
I didn't exactley write on my bucket list -- "hook up with a townie at a drivers intervention program"
I told him he didn't want "flip-flop extraction" on his medical history.
who said I'd never amount to anything...i just won 'most enthusiastic' at my poledancing class
I feel bad for her, but I feel like she's one of those resource-raping alien civilizations that visits planets, decimates them and then leaves. Those really aren't the qualities I appreciate in a friend. Ya know?
So somehow today's lecture on the immune system turned into me having to stand up and explain female ejaculation to the class.
Good night I hope you dream about knitting and threesomes
as much bud light as i have consumed over the years budweiser should give me a clydesdale
How early is too early to start drinking when studying for the bar?
I can still be you friend and be there for you. And sometimes get drunk and fuck you.
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Saw your dad at the bar last night... And again this morning when he left. Told you not to mess with me bitch.
IT'S PERFEFT
... what?
HIS DICK. IT'S PERFECT. BYE.
Randomize
