Thats the last time I go out drinking with my Irish friends. Two shots of flaming sambucca = bar on fire. I was only trying to high five the barman.
I have absolutely nothing sober to say to you.
The drunk teletubby stumbling out of the place tipped me off..
Well technically because of daylight savings, I only lasted 15 mintues.
Why the fuck is the royal wedding at 4am. That is obviously not the most appropriate time to drink during finals. It's like I'm bound to fail, by royal decree.
I'm stuck on the dance floor between two fat people. I don't think they feel my existence. Please help.
drinking from the bathtub cause I'm too lazy to walk downstairs and too thirsty to care
I can dry shave vagina like a champ
Ok spinning in the opposite direction thatg the room was spinning was the worst advice ever
It will be interesting
Isn't that your life's motto?
Is there one of me peeing? If so do I look bangable in it
I JUST WANTED TO GET SOME MOTHER FUCKING TACOS I AM SINGLE AS FUCK TACOS BRING PREOPLE TOGETHER OKAY
I'm not 100 percent on this, but I think I just shit a lump of cement. What the fuck happened last night?
Would you laugh at me if I told you I think I burned my nipples?
Well I've decided to refuse to conform to society and be naked the rest of the day.
Randomize