Pretty girls always come out on top. Or bottom. Whatever. Point is we come out with their boyfriends.
found an empty one..2nd door on the right...i'm already naked.
after I pulled back my foreskin she said, "cool like a transformer". I really like her now.
please just be careful, i just switched my facebook status to "in a relationship", i would look really pathetic if i had to change it back to "single" already
I brought up my Bobbly Flay drinking game in the interview. Of course I got the job.
That's the last time I do shots near a campfire.
The best thing about my promotion is that I now have an office with a door. I can take my naps in peace instead of leaning my head against the stall in the bathroom.
I can't believe they pay you six figures. I hate you.
I just sold some kid a bong I made out of a vuvuzela for $50. I think I found my career path.
The bouncer was being really rude for no reason. Steph PICKED him up and physically MOVED him from our path on the way out.
Well thats the pro of going out drinking with a pro body builder. Even if its a girl.
Dude, you chugged an entire bottle of tomato sauce and got us free drinks for the night. No way was I gonna stop you.
You're not supposed to support this behaviour, btw the judge recognized me
My neighbour is taking her hamster for a walk on a leash. Come over now
After getting all 4 of my wisdom teeth removed I asked my dentist how much better would I be at head
She blew me while I watched the jets game and the hardest thing was deciding what to focus on more
I need to find a divorced guy with a boat and let my tits do the talking
Randomize
