You flung your panties at that guy you liked with an accuracy that I have never seen before.
he said "you're pretty" then i made out with him. thats all it took
He just slept in my bed for a couple hours and asked lots of questions about gay sex. No, I do not have his number.
I totally just found ecstasy floating around in the bottom of my purse, it's almost like good karma from the time I lost that blow...but not quite
you had a pretty long talk with your shrooms in attempt to make them not give you a bad trip, it failed
I just had to explain to my 62 year old advisor what "tea-bagging" was in the middle of her lecture. I smell extra credit. And maybe a demonstration.
I'm imaging you naked, covered in butter. And I gotta say, I'm not impressed.
All together there was 318 cigarette butts in the pool... And my microwave.
Well, for starters, she called the condom a "dick mask."
which guy lost his keys in my bed this weekend?
I just remember dedicating a shot to me giving you head so it was obviously a good night
I'm saying "I told you so" now so that I don't slow down to say it on the way to grab the fire extinguisher
If you can't beat em, make them send you dick pics so they can't do anything stupid again.
I don't blame you. I made YouTube videos of me singing Rent songs then slept with a married couple. Fucking tequila.
She grabbed the other one and started playing tug-o-war against the blonde chick. I told you getting my nipples pierced was a good idea
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