to be honest..when i was little i used to think sharks can swim out of drains and eat people
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
but he used his one phone call to call mom and wish her happy mothers day, that's gotta count for somethin
He kept surfacing with a delighted look on his face, guessing different types of food to try to figure out what makes my pussy taste so good.
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
I just want to go to their admissions office and show them the video of him taking the flaming shot, and be like yeah...you let in the kid who lit his entire face on fire over me.
We have a pile of chopped wood here that suggests we may have chopped down a tree of some sort.
Lmao I should put that ad on Craigslist "in need of muscular and determined team of men to carry drunken birthday whore safely home"
I was woke up by the fucking Star Spangled Banner this morning. I sat up in bed and put my hand over my naked heart. I was so confused
Btw, you're my emergency contact at Planned Parenthood
no body wants to do anything today cause it's too cold, but a guy can only masturbate so many times a day. Ya know
If I'm walking weird, don't judge me. Things got kinda outta hand with the GoPro on.
Wait, cocaine is okay but tanning isn't?
All I remember is being lured out to sit by the fire by you holding a piece of pizza in front of me
I know it sounds cheesy, but i think both me and her mum know they are "thanks for being so cool about finding nudes of your daughter on the camera" flowers
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