worst. lesbian. ever. i'm not sure she knows a clit from a pencil eraser.
I'd call her a cunt, but she dooesn't seem to have the depth or warmth.
It's Christmas week. I wouldn't know what to do if i wasn't hung over.
You were like pukeahontas last night, you tried to tell us you were okay, then you puked in the garden.
I told her she can't come to our bonfire because she throws up on herself & she has a mustache. And now apparently I'm a bitch or something.
She was telling me which girls she thought I should fuck or not at the bar. Why can't all one night stands be that cool after?
Also, you peed on your hand last night. Id just like to point that out
You're just jealous because you lost me and I ended up at another party licking Marshmallow Fluff bikinis off of lesbians.
If I had pants on, you wouldn't be getting this text message
anyone who texts me today gets a complimentary picture of my mangled foot. starting with you.
ewwwww wtf when you left last night you were fine?
Just puked in my hallway. Good start to a great night
I wore pigtails while I was having sex with that 22 year old just to make him feel like a pedophile.
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I'm still depressed that I forgot my ice cream at your place
last night someone said that theyd like to do drugs with a dolphin ... judging from the diagram on the wall we figured it out.
all we need now is a dolphin ... and some drugs.
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