Dude i fell asleep inside of her
thats awesome
I wish life had little blips of pornography
I have before 2 am pics and after 2am pics, which do you want to see first?
CNN just did a special on how to do heroin safely.. I recorded it for us
I was dancing barefoot on glass at one point. That really sobered me up.
What did I eat last night that was bloody?
he burped in my vagina and tried to deny it...
will you please stage a drunk girl intervention and tell him that his chain is severely harming his chances of getting laid tonight?
Do you think she will like "you don't have to swallow this time" gift certificates for Xmas?
OK! No more randoms over for the next month this is the third fucking time I caught a naked dude drinking my OJ in the middle of the night.
do you know where my other puke covered boot is
those were not strange pants with a really large waist band...it took me 3 days to realize I was wearing someone's sweater as pants
Like if Ohio doesn't think I can get smashed on wine I will gladly prove them wrong
The first time he ever tried to hold my hand, I moon walked away.
Ugh. All the good hoes are in their third trimester.
Randomize
