I told u I don't really remember everything lol i pretty much remember not lasting as long as I norm and that I wore a condom, I hate condoms
Thats not how I planned it, its just the way she passed out
One can only hope that this night would end with my thumb in another humans rectum.
I'm bringing poparts in case anyone gets hungry. The trek to frat row is strenuous.
I am not deleting the internet history anymore, now I am going for shock value.
just because she blew him doesn't mean she knows his name.
I'm pregaming before our pregaming dinner...with peanut butter and beer. I think I need to re-evaluate my budget...
Just the budget?
The more and more I think about it, the more I realize... it's not ok to just pull over on the side of the highway to pee... I'm sorry I argued that
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
He kept kissing me on the cheek when I was pretending to sleep while he cried
I say camping because "let's go get hammered in the woods" sounds kinda fucking weird to be honest.
Well, why would you bring gelado into a strip club?
I mean there are real risks associated with having unprotected sex, but I don’t think I need to worry about a ghost possessing me and having unprotected sex while using my body
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
My brain is a dvd screensaver and I'm allowed to have a good thought when it hits the corner
Randomize
