if i could have babies with my dog i totally would cause i know thay would be fucking hott babies.
I just got hit in the face by an old lady love handle.
Fuck now we have to have sex
What?
In a bet, need to win
it was like a zeppelin in a condom
i gave her a can of corn and told her the cabs are accepting non perishable food items over the holidays. blatant lie and she lives like $40 away
I just woke up to pictures of every angle of his dick I'll ever need to see.
You declared war on your ex and then had sex with who you thought was her sister. No one knows who she was but we think your dick might be in danger.
Well Apparently I went to piss out my window last night, woulda been ok if I opened the window or the blinds.
Is it morally wrong to give today's hookup a Krispy Kreme from yesterday's hookup or is it just fat love?
That's a lot of people she's fucked in one picture.
Gary just stuck his dick in his Guinness. I can't even make this up
Recliner chair sex has moments of worry....just don't.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Our sex is like an episode of "The Simpsons." Picture Homer choking Bart, and that's pretty much what we're into.
It's not my fault I make her feel like a Taylor Swift album
Randomize
