Yea and his cousin visited from central and i fucked her i was texting him at work teasin him about it but sent it to his mom by accident
Do you know how hard it is to masturbate with a runny nose?
Would it be cruel if i sold xanax instead of adderall to freshman unfamiliar to the drug-taking profession?
Fire inspection over. Blunts are OK
Friday was tragic. I was naked on top of him and he didn't have a condom. Oh and he had an Obama poster on the wall in front of his bed so our president was staring down at me while I was naked. I felt sorta bad.
You should've just screamed yes we can!
Anyways, i'm off to play with a rubber dick and a ouija board with two other girls...
he fucked me to the beat of the construction going on outside my house. i will never look at jackhammers the same ever again.
we somehow managed to fit a llama, a stripper pole and a hayride all into the same day.
Yknow what, if there is a thug life for white bitches, I'm living it. I went out on a date, watched howls moving castle with my brother till he passed out, then went and got some a+ dick, and made it home in time to take my mom to work. Now its 7am, I'm in bed with some free tacos, and when I'm done eating I'm going to sleep. What a great night.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
In last nights drunken stupor i apparently purchased a luxury travel package for two to Australia. So uh...get a passport and clear your schedule for next month
I would bite a mans dick off for a chocolate milk.
I had forgotten what new underwear feels like. It's as if angels descended from heaven for the sole purpose of supporting my junk.
This is why you have to watch more Zombie movies- to prepare for End Times...
He asked if I could not say his name during sex cause he liked the girl in the apartment above me.
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