her fupa was seducing me. this is the last time i'm doing shrooms.
He told me they were just razor bumps!
4 maple syrup blunts. Decided to sit on my roof and count the snowflakes that landed on my tongue. 84.
FYI angry masturbation is not as cool angry sex
I may be in pain from falling off the roof but getting to the morning roof keg was well worth it.
We are NOT roofying him just to get him to pass out so we can build a masive snow cock in his yard.
I had a dream that our used condom started talking to me. I told me that I did an amazing job, and told me that it saved me. From aids.
I think we should bring back the casual nipple tassel
In hindsight combining orgy Thursday with mystery drink madness was begging for failure
I won't trust your judgement until the word stripper doesn't make me laugh
I hope to God it's not the new neighbors having sex, because what I'm hearing sounds like a mildly defective vuvuzela or a cow giving birth.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
Mark my words I will never date another cop again. I don't care if he's JESUS.
The most adult decision I've mad today was Jameson or Fireball? It's been a successful Day
In other news, the one guy I DIDN'T have sex with in High School is now famous.
Randomize
