Kareoke will never be a sober sport
Nothing too bad. Lost a stuffed horse on a stick and tore my clothes off. Again.
the only thing i knew about you is that u dated jordan and were potentially interested in a threesome
I'm afraid that if I tell my sister I think Zachary Quinto is gay I'll have to put her on suicide watch for the next week or so
i called my brother from the living room and paid him a dollar to turn off the light in my room. ive hit rock bottom
Threesome last night. Not that cool, you tend to pick a favorite.
hows that letter of apology to the waitress at waffle house coming?
did she really think she could get into the club & no one would recognize her from 16 & pregnant???
She's "scared" of blowjobs, so she just played with it for a while.
So, do you know where my left shoe is? I mean, we were at a few places last night, and I called them. No luck for me.
There's somethin not right about having to take the batteries out of your 27 year old boyfriends gameboy to use in your vibrator
You kept running up to married couples, taking their pictures and begging for them not to get divorced
When you glanced over and and mouthed "I'll take the fat chick" I knew it was going to be an epic Sunday night.
She fell off the bed and giggled until she passed out naked. It was really weird.
Probably not gonna date her.
this weekend took five years off my life and what was left of my dignity
Randomize
