Just got a blowjob to the theme of Bohemian Rhapsody as the sun was rising. I should just kill myself because ill never top this moment.
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
This could be one of the worst things i've done... The background of her phone is her and her boyfriend.
I've never seen a kid turn down a sure thing for a possible handy by a freshmen. You need to re-evaluate.
Dude, seduce him with cookies. You almost turned me gay with scones. Don't be surprised when they get you laid.
Welcome to the south, dude. Gives the phrase "I wish you a dry ass" a new perspective.
He walks in. We each have a tiki torch. We say, the tribe has spoken. We put his out and then stab him with it.
We should hook up after this. Laugh or look horrified to say yes.
Topenga is going to be back on TV. Finally my fantasy of her being a milf in junior high has come full circle.
you stole two subs and a drink from jimmy johns and walked out yelling "get at me bitches"
so i might have figured out why that girl isn't talking to me...I'm 90% confident I didn't give her a pillow when she stayed over >.>
Life's too short to be sucking dicks in cars for the rest of my life.
TSA literally pulled two bottles of whiskey out of my bag. Once he saw the leopard print socks and the mickey mouse tank, he put it back in my bag and said "Have a fun trip, man."
This time tomorrow I will be drunk and in a voodoo shop
Just got a handjob in my psych lecture. You were right, going to class is paying off.
Randomize