She tried to have sex with him but he quote unquote respected her
She looked like her face caught fire, and someone put it out with a screwdriver.
I just want to know how you cleaned her puke off the twister mat with no gloves. And didn't throw up
discovery: the myth about swedish girls giving good head? not a myth.
the next morning i told him i was impressed that he remembered my name. he said it wasn't that hard when "tracy
I had a dream that the allstate guy hooked up with flo from the pregressive insurance commercials and she gave birth to the geico gecco. I need to stop taking ambian.
Your beautifulness. Funnyness. Sexy hairness. Coolness. Plus you ask google how far wendys is from your house. Will you marry me
I just took a dump to end all dumps. Other dumps have already written ballads about it. It was the Armageddon dump. Bruce Willis was there, it was awful.
He taped a champagne bottle to both his hands and called himself edward champagne hands. At one point he poured some on his lap and said " Just needed to make sure my dick got some too"
Thank god I didn't get free from the hospital restraints. I wouldent have lasted long drunk, startled and in an ass-less gown In D.C.
Nothing like the soothing screaming of your neighbor getting boned while eating a pizza on the front porch.
Plus who wants to live somewhere tom jerked off? No one.
Just wanted to share my unfortunate vagina news in the hopes that it would make your vagina feel better about itself.
I am luring the porn star to my house with chicken!
He said it was the classiest hand job he ever had because my nails were painted red. We need to go to nicer bars from now on.
Randomize
