Fiestas. Its like a classier verson of mardi gras.
Spaghetti and Car Bombs, good idea or what will end up on the bar in a few minutes?
is this the sara with the beer cane?
Promise me, at my funeral, you will re-enact our human sledding incident of 2011....you can use my dead body as said sled.
So half of us were already throwing up outside when the Ukrainians ask us if we're ready to start partying yet. I love this country.
No. Mother. Fucking. Jello shots. Just no. I'm not falling into that trap again.
Absolutely. I could drink and smoke that memory away in a matter of years at my current rate.
It'd be easier to list the surfaces my ass hasn't been on.
Do to my newly discovered condition I'm having to resort to emergency beat sessions to avoid the temptation to text girls I know are easy slams.
You just kept screaming "PLEASE YELL CORNDOG AT HIM. PLEASE. CORNDOG."
Today, my weed came in a pokéball. I officially love my dealer.
It's all fun and games until your in the alumni campus center puking on the floor
It's gonna be me and some oreos tonight. Basically like sex
Are those your contacts stuck to the mirror?!
Yeah. Drunk me tried to put my contacts on the mirror where my eyes were.
I forgot to lock the door last night. I woke up cuz a guy opened my bedroom door, asked me who I was and where he was. And there was another guy standing in the living room asking me if I knew what apartment "Travis" lives in.
Randomize
