btw.sex in the wood isnt as romantic as it seems.heels kept sinking in the dirt and pine needles were sticking to the fishnets
i wish i had your life
Last night Brynn convinced every person at the party wearing glasses that they stole hers, and she woke up with 8 pairs of prescription glasses in her bag.
So after the reception we snuck back into the church for drunken hook up. we passed out there and woke up in time for 6am mass still dressed from the wedding. spiritually trashy or classy?
You've picked up chicks by quoting metal bands
When they're drunk they believe it's Shakespeare...enjoy the simple things
dont get mad but guess who just got banned for life from dodger stadium
whenever he goes down on me he looks at me and I just want to poke him in the eyes
Welp, she's chewing our paper towels again. She's like an obnoxiously hot puppy
Using the salt from a pretzel bag for tequila shots. Come over.
Mid way while flirting with this super hot chick at the bar, he gets up and says no thanks I'm only 19 and gay just waiting for my buddy to hurry up and get with your friend.
Strip club for my birthday. And none of this discrimination shit. We're going to a guys one and girls one. Go get your singles.
MY roomie made me a chinese name- it's supposed to mean 'the girl of a thousand sins.'
We were all day drunk by 2pm. Now I know why they hate Americans
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
I'm wandering around outside asking things if they are god
I drank so much that my feet don't feel like my feet
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