Is that you in the white hat?
Fine suit yourself
Just got done shaving my balls. You were right.
i was watching iron chef and got motivated, so i made dinosaur chicken nuggets
You discussed the Arab/Israeli conflict with the guy behind the counter at the Kebab shop telling him you supported his people. He was clearly Asian.
Why are you seriouly talking to me about this when there naked pics of blake lively on the internet? Priorities man...
you asked my brother if you could eat the cupcake that you found. you were showing him a baked potato
So the crazy cock blocking bitch sent her a picture of her boobs using MY phone and said: he's busy at the moment
Just woke up with an eye that wont open, a half eaten piece of pizza on my chest and a raging boner.
The only difference is Iv never super glued straws to your nipples.
I may be bringing home two guys tonight. I'f they won't go for a double-team you can have the lanky one.
My mom just asked me if I can obtain a fake ID by thursday
he's a fucking beast. people that don't even know him have started calling him "puke and raleigh"
I just opened a beer with a child's toy at a 5 year olds birthday....can you look up the next AA meeting?!!
yeah....try hearing them in person. it sounds like two muppets going at it
He gave me a back massage while we were fucking.
Did you get that?
WHILE WE WERE FUCKING.
Randomize
