you need to know that there is a kid here wearing an i mosh for Jesus shirt
he said "cool" when i took off my bra and proceeded to stare wideeyed at them the ENTIRE time. it was like sleeping with the kid i showed my boobs to for the first time in 6th grade.
She needs to learn she only fits into our friendship as a DD.
I hope you realize, I'm counting on you as my wingman next semester. It's your turn to advertise another man's penis. I did my tour all freshman year.
I have a test in the morning in sign language about signs for drugs and alcohol use. Im drunk and rolling a blunt. I've never felt so confident about a grade in my life.
There is a dude in a thong with a Nerf axe having battles in the street. Welcome to Portland
Should I go sleeveless of strapless?
Hmmm, it doesn't matter. You're gonna be topless by the end of it.
You're the reason I lose Never Have I Ever
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
whoa whoa whoa, you're saying I shouldn't post pics of you balls deep in a southern hottie?
We fucked for 9 months, but he didn't want anything serious. So, I got rid of him and went on a date with a guy last night that looks like Kylo Ren. Who's really winning here?
Had phone sex with my boss who I still haven’t seen in person. How’s your Monday ?
so my parents definitely heard me when I was cumming last night...
If I take a couple more shots I won't even know he's a Mormon that drives a motorcycle
He puked all over the side of the car and the head rest behind him...and then all he said was "America."
Randomize
