I thought she had blonde hair
No, Gonorrhea actually
I can't believe he cheated
Whatever. Anytime she has an orgasm, it's because I taught him how
Internet sex stories have completely ruined the word sopping for me.
Drunk in a canoe getting pulled by a lawnmower thinking of you
did i try to light ur hair on fire with a sparkler at the club saturday?
I walked in on you rubbing your nose all over his face while straddling him and yelling "I'M SO SORRY!" repeatedly. I'd say you were in pretty good shape at that point in the night.
Zip lining have a big frozedn drink with 151 rum chippendale pic life is GREAT
You were running around drunk in a Toga chasing the frat's Husky. Of course they remember you.
You need to braveheart it on Monday. Blue face paint and a loin cloth screaming freedom in your front yard.
we were the definition of too high: argued for 10 minutes about who was gonna get the condom (it was 2 feet away on the night stand) and past out watching adventure time.
Its not chugging if its just one gulp
So apparently when I'm drunk and want water I pant like a dog and expect to have water given to me..
we played animal sounds and i linked arms with her cuz we were both cats....fate and my community college drama teacher have chosen my one night stand
I feel like I'm in a development meeting for a Lifetime original movie.
yes, i'm a douce. but i'm a high quality douche.
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