i fell asleep last night with fifteen animal crackers in my mouth. rock bottom dude.
that's just what I need...drunk ass people throwin hatchets in the dark.
is it bad that while shopping i looked specifically for clothes that hold their form after taking them off and putting them on again and again?
I'm cheering for the colts this year. I basically have to since my fake says i'm from indianapolis
you were on ground yelling about how close the floor was to your face.
i'm having flashbacks of crying and telling you i was made out of egg salad.
where are you guys? the police just woke me up on the couch outside.
It was a group decision to take your pants off. Took a solid 10 minutes. No more skinny jeans while drinking.
Even dream me is a champ at smoking weed
the evidence suggests last night I either took a bath in beer or drank 18 beers while in the bath. either one sounds good to me. sad i don't remember it
she had a dildo shaped like a dolphin. she will forever be known as Flipper
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
I woke up next to a box of cheese bread it was super romantic
Haha. I found pics last week of me getting motorboated by a girl while i was taking a shot. Hahaha in my wedding dress. Classy
Pro tip: If you tell him that his dick looks like a muppet then you won't have to see him again.
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