I don't make mistakes...just understandable bad choices.
the bulge in his pants is not junk. its hair. trust.
closing bar tabs have helped me with simple math in college.
Only you can can turn Jenga into a drinking and then a sex game.
tonight i'm going for the "i fuck with the lights on" look
With any luck I will spend the duration of this flight with my tray table up my seatbelt securely fastened and my face in his lap
If you don't want me in your apartment then lock your door better
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
....she made me stop for like 3 minutes so she could talk to her cat....
Tip of the day: Don't Amazon vibrators when your WHOLE FAMILY uses your prime account. There's dildo after dildo showing up in my "Related to Items You've Viewed" category on the home page.
And change of plans today, I'm gonna lay in bed and eat taco bell and try not to die. Brazilians another day.
My dad is sitting where you rode me
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
Is it appropriate to be taking shots at 11 on sunday?
Absolutely same thing as church only different
He has the fingertips of a God
Randomize
