Maybe I'll tuck it in and pretend to be a woman pretending to be a man that is attracted to women that are attracted to women who look like men
dont worry your back hair reminds me of angel wings
He said i was a degenerate twofaced catholic slut and a grade a bitch. Quite complimentary really. i guess i shouldn't insult the red wings
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
I woke up wearing nothing but his lifeguard whistle..
Dude just read our convo. Apparently I was talking to you while I was naked. She wasn't happy about it.
Only thing I know is apparently I danced with a bouncer and we got a ride back from a valet who was driving one of the cars he was supposed to be parking
You may have gone on a date, but I ate chicken nuggets shaped like dinosaurs for dinner tonight. I think we both know who the real winner is here.
That's a beautiful sentiment.
I am descending into that finals week rage fueled by ramen, mountain dew and bad sex is what's up.
My stuff that was at your place last night smells like doughnuts. I'm not even mad.
i asked my neighbor to open a bottle of vodka once and then we slept together
REMEBER. We are young, horny, and poor. If someone wants to give us alcohol... TAKE. IT.
There are condoms rolled onto each bunny ear of the ears I was wearing last night
I would've fucked Winston Churchill - rode that D like I was going into battle.
I guess you could say that.. I mean, we did walk in on our DD doing a keg stand thru her ass.
Randomize
