If relationships were based on ego stroking and meaningless sex, we'd be soulmates
I kind of feel like guidos are mythical creatures.
Call me pathetic, but saying "tits for ireland" is working out really well on chatroulette today.
First date. He's wearing a tuxedo shirt and keeps asking me about our future children. Escape plan #3 is now in action...
If you hook up with your cousin you will permanently be my favorite person ever.
Christ, I really took the slutcake last night.
Wait. Someome brought slutcake?
Boys should be on-demand - like, once you select one, he's yours for the next 24-hours
One small step for man, one big gay fierce leap for gays!
i just called my dad a bottom. he agreed
You were talking to yourself and eating cold cuts in the kitchen when I found you
is it acceptable to cross the border for sex?
I'm glad our friendship can withstand laughing mid-blowjob during the diarrhea scene in Dumb & Dumber.
Crying in Target on a display sofa is normal, right? Asking for a friend.
My new favorite word is dickbag. I think its relevant here. And I say that with all the love in the world.
"Offered to eat Froot Loops out of my belly button" drunk. Thats how drunk.
Randomize
