at some point to night u and I have a 'meeting' too...(1-737): I hope so
Earlier, I saw a homeless man that looked like Abe Lincoln, and I just saw a guy walk past wearing crocs and socks. I'm beginning to like this city less and less
He ignores my calls like im some kind of stalker chick
Ive only called 5 times
That's not ass to mouth..... That a rim job!! Are you telling me she licked your asshole?!
I just saw a girl walk by me wearing a "kiss me I'm pro choice" shirt. Is that a signal for easy access?
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
Finally put clothes on I've been laying naked in the bed for approximately 4 hours since I showered and by showered I mean when I laid down in the bathtub with the shower on
why is there a broken handcuff locked to the ceiling fan
He'd pee in it. And since it's PBR I'd have no idea
Hey my dad gave me life the least I can do is take him chicken strips and a pack of marlboros.
If your night didn't end with writing a witness report for the cops at a shwarma place, your night was probably less interesting than mine.
Look,the guy had sex w/a Canadian prison guard on the deck of a cruise ship,he could blow any second.
Desperation looks like a $1 bottle of vodka and warm Cuban tap water.
Well we found Mark's missing underwear. They're pinned up on Mike's trophy wall.
You poured all their beer into ziploc baggies so it would be "better on the go"
Randomize
