My drunk dialing habit needs to go. My drunk habit can stay though.
Apparently throwing up on his dick didnt convince him to stay away . . . whats the most indirect way of saying "im just going to continue avoiding you"?
Seriously, stop peeing all over the toilet seat. It looks like movie theatre butter.
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
just spent about 3 1/2 hours looking for a dollar so I can buy weed.
suggestion: become a stripper.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
Shame?!? Shame only comes from getting naked in front of strangers and it not being awesome
He told me I look like a librarian today. I hope that means he has a librarian fetish or something
Disregard. He says he said I look "agrarian" today and just proceeded to compare me to Mumford and Sons. Fuck it, I'm going home and drinking
I was proudly and successfully the first girl ever to get kicked out of a the bar for being too drunk last night. Loving spring break.
Its almost 1 am and u wanna get together and cry naked
So my ex vomited in front of my door and passed out there
Haha idk you were stealing pizza dough at dominos
...and now I welcome the sweet embrace of death.
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
Oh no. He's definitely text-flirting with me. No straight man over 30 has any other excuse to use so many smiley faces...
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