So he says "lean over this" which is a chain across the doorway, held into the wall with bolts. I do. Then he puts his weight on top of me to try and get it in.
It breaks. We fall.
I now have a broken nose, a concussion, and an infected, split lip. Why do I have the worst luck in guys?
you know you've been playing too much mario kart when you see a curve in the road ahead and see yourself drifting around it
I got a lap dance until she said they wipe of the poles between each dance to clear the "std slime", i couldnt even masterbate at home it was a horrible military monday
So I was blaaazed. & while he was in me all I kept thinking was how bad I'd rather be watching The Office.
I can't, I'm busy. I've been walking around Tokyo on google maps for an hour.
He told me he doesn't dance and he hates drunken excitement. Why I ever thought it would work is beyond me.
no, i'm currently making the trek across campus to get all my stuff from last night. My ID is in one guys bed, and my camera in another guy's bed.
We literally just Chinese fire drilled so I could give him road head.
I wish I was there to have sex with you on the plane to lessen your anxiety.
That's the nicest thing anyone has over said to you.
I'm pretty sure I just need an IV drip of Plan B at this point...
I have stickers all over my boobs and a lump the size of china on my forehead. today has not been good.
I walked in on him jerking it to videos of UFC fighters. The most awkward part: he didn't stop when I walked in.
It's Christmas. You could splurge on something a LITTLE fancier than wine in a box.
He serenaded me say anything-style with Weird Al songs and then blew me on the beach. I'd say he's a keeper.
you stood in front of the mirror for 20 minutes and finally said, "he can hear everything i'm saying inside my head. we need to leave." now try and tell me there is no such thing as too high.
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