You'd love this place it's beautiful. Plus these people smell like garlic
Do you think flip cup during wine tasting is a bad idea? They're perfect flipping cups...
I have more bruises, scratches, and overall soreness from my birthday weekend than my car accident.
I just stole a cupcake from somebody's bottle service
And I got $4 when somebody made it rain.
you took a potato out of your pocket and just started eating it raw. don't know where the potato came from though
21st birthday = success
I just learned how to imitate a trains smokestack. The downside is it makes you look like you ate cocaine. The upside is YOU LOOK LIKE A TRAIN
The squirrels are partying on my roof again. Now they're just rubbing it in that I'm home alone on a Saturday night and they're having orgies.
Thought about you all night last night, then I fucked the shit out of my boyfriend. Win win for me.
Yeah yeah, I don't care. I bought a super soaker, so lets please go attracting attention by spraying each other while wearing white tank tops?
It's no longer hooking up, we have definitely graduated to Sport Fucking....
Vodka and tater tots have managed to satisfy me more than most of the guys I've slept with.
Dude of course I want to. Your penis is beautiful.
Yeah, this is not that. This is a father and son bonding moment involving my all of my orifices.
I tried to have a quickie with him at the company happy hour. I think I need to quit my job.
COME HERE AND I WILL SUCK YOUR COCK UNDER THE LIGHT OF THIS BEAUTIFUL ELECTRICITY
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