Goddamnit I hate your level headedness
u on campus? she just peed the bed i need to go
I called her a whore. 15 minutes later she gave me head at arby's while i was eating a roast beef. best afternoon ever
No, when he said that he wished he had my eyebrows, THATS when I knew he was gay.
yeah i fucked her in the storage room on the inflatable mattress. i don't know if i should feel proud for me or bad for her.
and then he put stevie wonder on to fuck to...and hummed along as I blew him
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
he made his penis look like a sprinkler when he was coming. it was pretty cool actually.
friends don't put videos of other friends on youtube puking on their professor on the first day
He gave me a hug and said "He doesn't deserve you, Anna. Your boobs are great, and I'd fuck you anytime. Any. Place." I need a new 'gay' friend.
Wake up. Finish House of Cards. Put on pants.
Accurate.
Naked. naked and bneed help.
Your birthday is now over. Your day in the spotlight has dimmed and now you're as special as everyone else. The world goes back to revolving around me. Good night.
No we were too stoned to stop you from wiping the peanut butter all over the car.
The only good thing about being back at work is supply room boom boom with my office husband
Randomize
