Is it normal to miss your booty call?
The size of her hoop earrings are directly related to how much of a slut she is.
Calvin and Hobbes are double-teaming a butterfly. They're in the bathroom, and drawing a crowd.
why did I try to FaceTime with 311 last night?
I ended up passing out on the shitter for like an hour with mcds smoothie all over my face
while i am personally glad that we met...i feel like for society as a whole it was a bad thing
Also, you need to stop getting hammered and taking showers with people.
WHITE RUSSIAN BREAKFAST CEREAL.
You mistakenly try to piss in a cactus bush ONE TIME and are forever dubbed cactus ass
even my drug dealer wished me a happy birthday before my mother did.
And thanks for putting me in that safety position on the bathroom floor while I was spooning the toilet
Update: pile o Coke party starting at approx 4 - 7 and going until 1ish to celebrate our founding fathers and love of cocaine and hatred of everyone\n
Getting on a bus with a beer pong table. I am proof we can make this campus fun.
Forget about letting a 70-year-old man suck on my tits for coke... telling my new boyfriend about it was the poor life choice.
Why is my belly button ring in my ear
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