To answer your question of whether I "went back," tits just informed me I was kicked out for falling off my barstool and passing out on the floor...
He's gotten way too comfortable around me. He came into the bathroom and took a shit while I was in the shower.
New drink name: the Vermont Douchebag. Take shot of maple syrup, drop into cup of jager, bomb.
his facial hair looked like he just ate out someone's ass
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
Props to the guy on crutches playing edward forty hands. Dedicated to drinking games is an understatement.
The weed is temporarily burning the grammar section of my brain library.
Correction... Drunk on winter break. There are no days of the week on break.
You should have seen the pharmacists face when I paid for my inhaler refill and a box of condoms.
Just saw a dude take a shot in the parking lot in his car. Too early in the semester for that
Because it's not worth it. And there is no nice way of saying "sorry, you're not good enough at sex for me to drive 45 mins"
Spending Thanksgiving making a swinging profile brings the day to a whole new level...
If I could figure out how to do him with his wranglers on you would never see me again.
Guess who just set half their backyard on fire.
Please tell me youre joking.
Nope. on the brightside though, im really gonna quit smoking this time.
Randomize
