my dad just encouraged me to do a kegstand
He only uses me for sexual pleasure. The sad part is I don't even feel like a slut. I just I feel like I should just live in the top drawer of his nightstand....for free of course.
remind me not to puke in the mesh trash can tonight
they have a walk of shame score keeper on their fridge. I marked my tally for him on my way out..
I managed to lose everything but my socks.. which stayed on all 6 times we had sex.
Just promise me we won't die tonight. I can't have an autopsy report that reads "stomach contents: Tequila and semen."
And in my birthday dress, with my friends, i peed on myself in line for the club. Still went in and partied. I remember pieces
He just got here and all he's wearing is a cloth over his penis.
I'll uninvite my mom
You gotta hand it to him. 6 hours in a new town and he's already fuck someone, had his ass kick by her bf, and rounded up a posse of people to kick this guys ass.
smoked some of that legal weed last night, felt like God himself legit bent me over his knee and spanked my ass. Never again..never.
My bathing suit kept falling whenever I went under a wave and this kid caught on and kept checking them out so I told him nothing comes free $5 a boob
It is clearly not my fault that you decided studying was more important than trying to bang our hot teacher for an A, so I seized the opportunity.
i found you laying on the floor staring at the ceiling and you kept muttering "why" in various inflections.
I'll keep supplying drugs if you teach me piano.
You ever fart so hard it made you cum a little? A "friend of mine" wanted to know.
Randomize
