You asked the officer if he could bring you to the same jail as T.I.
Her problem is just that he inner beauty is just as ugly as her physical beauty
his cum shot went directly into his bellybutton. felt like i was playin ski ball
You stuck your head out the window to puke and got hit with a mailbox.
I know this may seem inappropriate, but are you gonna bring any blow to the wedding?
Honestly, It follows the same rules as Cock Roulette.
Thanks, girl! That means a lot. I can't wait to share my jail stories with you over salad and cupcakes.
We tried to play tennis but after about 15 minutes we gave up and fucked against the fence. Woulda been a cute third date so of course I had to ruin it.
Just so you know, I woke up with 2 oven mits in my bed and no clothes on.
I'm so excited you texted me but I'm way to high to process it
I turn into such a nice and loving person when I take Vicodin
I have peed in a lot of sinks
I'm keeping him.
Sex was good?
I had to tap out three times. There aren't words for how much better than "good" that is.
New life goal: Sex in a parking lot surrounded by a circle of fire.
I shouldn't be allowed to be in america for NYE... or any major holiday for that matter
Randomize
