exactly what part of this weekend seemed like a good idea?
May have finally hit rock bottom...bouncer from the strip club informed me I wore the same shirt last night
Just saw cops pull over the ice cream truck. What a dick
your youtube search consisted of "food slideshow" and "the angry beavers"
what made it akward was his girlfriends dog watching us have sex
You talked to that cop for like 15 minutes and when you got back, you told us you were "networking".
We had a long talk in which he told me he respects me more than any other girl. 30 minutes later, I got a facial.
i really should have bought real food rather than condoms, olives, coleslaw and beer...
It's just like riding a horse. A very tall, gay horse.
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
hes either a crazy bad problem or a crazy good orgasm. I just can't decide which one.
In light of your oncoming completion of twenty-three years of personhood, I feel a pressing need to blast country-pop phenomenon Taylor Swift's hit single "22" in your general direction until midnight.
Don't be alarmed when we finally get naked and I let out a WOOHOO!!!
Last night was like blooper reel sex. He dropped me!!
i just found a pair of your underwear stuffed behind my harry potter books...was that on purpose?
haha no, it was majik
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