I didn't sleep with her. I'm boycotting arizona and she's from phoenix.
Drunk lesbians having an argument about their realationship isn't as hot as I imagined.....
We are so drunk I just let him piss between my legs on the toilet. That's love.
i don't think my dad can get all that mad since he got arrested for almost exactly the same thing last weekend
He told me that I smelled like a Glade Plug-in, then sang the Menard's jingle in it's entirety in between kissing me.
i just went 2 months without giving head... thats like two months without coffee. or two months without sun.
so some random man just messaged me on facebook "tig ol bitties" should i be concerned?
Now all we have to do is pretend we haven't seen each other naked. Work tomorrow is going to be FUN.
I just had cybersex with some guy from the Netherlands for 2 HOURS instead of doing my History project...how's your break going?
Please come over, I'm slowly melting into a ball of sexual frustration. If I'm not dead by the end of the day be very surprised.
Just jerked off with bubble wrap. Not as awesome as it sounds.
He made me put my cow print vest and my cowboy hat from my ' sheriff woody' costume and said I'll show you a woody. What I charmer huh!? I love make up sex
When I woke up I had 6 missed calls making sure I was ok and asking if I remember showing my tits to a picture of her baby.
He sent me a snap with the dog tongue filter. I might have to bench him.
Is it wrong for me to wish my cat had arms to get me a beer?
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