with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
is it bad that the first thing i do when i get downstairs is go on farm town?
Besides Rainforest Cafe, there's nowhere i'd rather be intoxicated than here
I need to write the inventor of adderall a thank you note stapled to a copy of my degree
I traded my shirt for vodka. I wonder if my parents can pinpoint where they went wrong raising me.
Look on the bright side. Now you know the number for poison control.
captain&coke to the library. STAT. this is an emergency. this is not a drill. I repeat: THIS IS NOT A DRILL.
Drunk naked twister. My place. Heath is trying to use his dick as a third leg.
Well he walked in last night, yelled at me for not playing any music and started dancing.
Your mission, should you decide to accept it, is to pick up rum, beer, and cigarettes. Your holiday will self-destruct if you ignore this message.
He sent a video of him jacking off....class will be awkward tomorrow
I know. In fairness he did tell me to throw up out his window onto his roof so I don't think he's pissed at me but I'm still mortified by the whole situation.
We should buy t shirt guns and blow eggs out of them at his house. Bachelorette party
WHY DON'T YOU WANT TO BE MY ESKIMO BRO
Alright, I've had enough of this good girl shit. Tonight you either blackout or backout.
Randomize
