It was like doing yoga with his dick in me
I just withdrew $200 in ones. I think the teller knew what was up
My porch is a mess of peanut butter and tostitos...thanks for that.
i cant do it anymore.. every time this girl orgasms she sounds like a motorcycle
they were fucking between cars in the parking lot and everyone was cheering at them.
They want me to get them some X for there wedding present. I'm on the way to get it now
Should we buy the taco bell before hand? Not having taco bell on Quattro de mayo isn't a risk I'm willing to take
Dont really know what happened near the end, Pockets were filled with skittles though
We were tripping too hard to figure out to tell him where we were so we sent a picture of me laying outside the tent saying "find us"
How is it possible that I'm still a virgin and you've managed to have sex in a cheetah print onesie TWICE
Only my second night back in town and I already have drunk middle aged women doing the robot around me in a circle.
My one regret (beside the inevitable shit storm that followed) is that now I can't fuck his cute friend.
I got so high that I ate a protein bar while in the shower. I then proceeded to leave half the protein bar and the wrapper on the ledge in my shower. Haha oh well.
Would I be a horrible mom if I got a babysitter at 6am so I could go get laid.
Are you serious?! She sent a pizza instead of showing up?!
She did indeed. Papa Johns. It helped because I was super hangry. That bitch is smart!
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