I'm watching harry potter...good thing I already know I'm gay
I didnt believe in cockblocking untill my roomate brought home that.
We can talk tomorrow when we're both alert. My mind is somewhere else right now.
Where's it at?
In your pants.
you kept insisting that i was jake gyllenhaal and you were heath ledger.
I'm seriously gonna die surrounded by a million cats and an unbroken hymen
I wore a leash I'll tell you about it later I had a fantastic time
I cant shower it involves moving...
Just lay there and turn the water on. At least rinse off the shame.
She had forties taped to her hands and was trying to give him a hand job while he was passed out, with everyone in the living room.
Well I let her practice her tattooing on me. This shaky dragon on my arm says Im getting laid.
you made out with another girl for some wings
It was a tough decision either lay in bed or go to work and lay in the stockroom
It's a sad day when a deadly hurricane headed your way is less depressing than your relationship status.
Valentine's Day is now to be known as Tacos and Orgasms Day.
I don't think we should let her have pot anymore. She ate an entire package of bacon half-cooked and screamed that it was al-dente.
What does "mood AF" mean?
Mood as fuck.
Why did you comment that on a video of a gorilla throwing its own shit?
Randomize