sometimes i wish i had a whole other life to spend on youtube
Thats cool. we found a cat INSIDE a coke machine.
i just found my sim card.....i hid it in my tylenol bottle....i guess to ensure i would find it mid-hangover
His sister just told me that she thinks i'm a stupid bitch and that by going thru with this I'm ruining his life.
sounds like a hell of a rehearsal dinner
No, i went to get it done but the guy couldnt find it. exhibit A of why i wanted a clit piercing in the first place.
Who's nuvaring is under my pillow?
Ughhhh. Finnnneeeeee. I'll have sex with your brother. Sheesh. The things I do for you woman.
i formally give you permission to eat me when i pass out
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
I smell like thanksgiving dinner and bad decisions. Its not even thanksgiving yet.
I'd like to buy a season pass to your dick please.
When God made him he put all his talent in his dick. What he lacks in brain, he makes up for in loin.
Why is there a horse in the backyard?
I stayed at my gfs last night. This is all on you.
Just so you know, it is really hard to rehydrate when everything is spiked with everclear.
Don't do it. It's 9 am on a Monday morning and I'm hungover. I can't deal with tears right now.
Randomize
