I feel like our bond as friends is a lot stronger now that I've talked to you on the phone while having sex.
It smells like Drakkar Noir and desperation out here.
That's why you should quit smoking.
We discussed how the marijuana was making the dopamine float around our nucleus accumbens last night when we were high. Yet another example of how our science classes are perverting our good times.
i dunno what you eat but your cum is all over my underwear and it smells like pretzels
Remember the time we were in the hospital and I wanted to steel the arm restraints and use them as sex toys?? Oh college memories....
Seriously what kind of college town is this? Nobody parties during the week or abuses perscription drugs
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
I gave you a piece of bread to sober you up. You wiped your face off with it and then gave it back to me.
The last time I thought I had a UTI, I ended up having herpes. Sooo.. This time in preparing myself for cancer or death.
Super stoned right now. And I stared at my exit, thought to myself "hey self. That is your exit" and I kept driving right past it.
hitting rock bottom is getting taziki in your hair & simply putting it in a bun instead of actually dealing with it, just like your problems
Like tbh you're not doing anything that screams I'm drunk and yet nothing says I'm going to spend $30 on McDonalds and make out with a stranger like that picture
Riddle me this: How does one check in at the Marriott, but wake up at the W?
Rarely does a man I fucked with upgrade from me
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
