no.. I went home. Puking up hot dogs and lemon tart isn't as lovely as it sounds.
Sober January is a disaster.
Completly hung over at midnight, I knew there was a downside to drinking at 2pm
im trying not to drink and cry in the same night anymore. i'll let you know how it goes
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
we weren't quite sure what was on that mirror, so we snorted it and hoped for the best
come onnn, where's your sense of adventure?!
I left it in that guy's dorm room.
I just wanted to share with you that my life has come to naked arts and crafts, to fix my flask, with a rum and coke in my hand... Good luck on your exam
Umm, ya, half our class is sitting in starbucks passing around flasks. Yes, flasks. Plural. Going to join them, we're all giving oral presentations in 20. Go hard or go home.
Although I am concerned about who made the decision to let you loose in a bridal show I am proud to see you in a sombero again.
Do you know how hard it is to maintain a conversation with someone who just told you they put their cat in the fridge on purpose?
He left his phone. Turns out he;s been sexting with some girls who can't spell. Time to break out the herpes scare.
Just remembered I said your cat looked delicious last night.
I have aggressive nipples.
I’m going to give his broken heart CPR with my vagina
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